This is a translation of a letter that I got (and which I also include in original as well), which claims to be copy of an authentic letter sent by a Croatian young man to the Croatian Secretary of Defense, to avoid military service. An extraordinary piece of deductive reasoning, worthy of attention of anyone interested in logic and related matters. Enjoy its truly Socratic brilliance!

Aleks

Dear Minister of Defense,

Please allow me to explain my situation in a hope that you will be able to resolve my case.

I am expecting to get the call to serve in the Croatian Army. I am 23 and I married a 47 year old widow who has a 26 year old daughter. Her daughter subsequently married my father. By marrying my wife's daughter, my father became my son-in-law. In the same time, my wife is a mother-in-law of my father, and her daughter is now also my step-mother.

In September my wife and I got a son. Clearly this child is a brother of my father's wife, and thus a brother-in-law of my father. In the same time, my son is also my uncle because he is a brother of my step-mother.

In October my father's wife got a son as well. This child is now also my brother because he is a son of my father. But I am the step-father of my wife's daughter and also a brother of her son whose father is also my father. Thus, my father's son is also my step-grand son because he is a son of my wife's daughter. Consequently, I am a brother of my own step-grandson, so I am also my own step-grand father.

However, according to the law, not more then two consecutive generations of fathers and sons (grand-father, father, son) can be called for military duty simultaneously, so I should be relieved from the military duty.

Thank you for your understanding.

The reply of the Croatian Ministry of Defense was sent only two weeks later, and it read:

The applicant is permanently relieved from the military duty due to possible mental problems and mental instability caused by the chaotic situation within his family.

Translated from the original Croation:

Ovo je istinito pismo kojim je nepoznati mladic u Hrvatskoj pokusao izbjeci vojnicku duznost.

Stovani gospodine ministre obrane,

Dozvolite mi da Vam objasnim svoju situaciju u nadi da cete moci razrijesiti moj slucaj. Trenutno cekam poziv u redove HV. Imam 23 godine, ozenjen sam 47-godisnjom udovicom, koja ima 26-godisnju kci. Sa tom kceri ozenjen je moj otac. Ozenivsi kci moje zene, moj je otac postao i moj zet. U isto vrijeme, moja je zena tasta mome ocu, a kci moje zene moja je maceha. U sijecnju zena i ja dobismo sina. To je dijete brat oceve zene, a zet moga oca. U isto vrijeme, to je dijete i moj stric, jer je brat moje macehe. U svibnju zena mog oca rodila je sina. To je dijete moj brat, jer je sin moga oca. U isto vrijeme, to je dijete i moj unuk, jer je sin zenine kceri. Dakle, ja sam brat svoga unuka, a s obzirom da je muz necije majke i otac toga djeteta, ja sam i otac zenine kceri, te brat njenog sina. Jasno je, dakle, da sam ja svoj vlastiti djed. Nadam se da sam sve jasno objasnio. Nadam se, gospodine ministre, da cete me razrijesiti vojnicke duznosti, jer zakona nalaze da sinovi vise od dviju generacija (dakle djed, otac i unuk) ne smiju istovremeno sluziti vojsku. Hvala vam na razumijevanju.

Odgovor Ministarstva Odbrane RH uslijedio je nakon dva tjedna.

U izvjestaju pisalo je: Osoba je permanentno razrijesesna vojnicke duznosti, zbog sumnje psihickih nedostataka i mentalne nestabilnosti koje su poslijedica kaotickih odnosa unutar obitelji.